Having a Blast

A guy buys a new Lincoln Navigator for $42,500.00 with monthly payments of $620. He and a friend go duck hunting in northern Wisconsin. It's early winter and all of the lakes are frozen. These two guys go out on the ice with their guns, a big, black Labrador retriever and of course the new Lincoln.

They decide they want to make a natural looking open water area for the ducks to focus on and something for the decoys to float on. Making a hole in the ice large enough to invite a passing duck, is going to take a little more power than the average drill auger can produce. So out of the back of the new Navigator comes a stick of dynamite with a short 40-second fuse.

The two Rocket Scientists, afraid they might slip on the ice while trying to run away after lighting the fuse, decide upon the following course of action.

They light the fuse. And with a mighty heave-ho, throw the stick of dynamite as far away as possible.

Without skipping a beat the Labrador retriever takes-off across the ice at a high rate of speed and grabs the stick of dynamite (with the burning 40-second fuse) just as it hits the ice.

The two guys swallow, blink, start waving their arms and with veins in their necks swelling to resemble stalks of rhubarb, scream and holler at the dog to stop.

The dog, cheered-on by all of the waving and shouting, keeps coming - picking-up speed along the way.

One hunter panics, grabs the shotgun and shoots in the direction of the dog. The shotgun is loaded with #8 bird shot, hardly big enough to stop a big, goofy, male, Lab.

The dog pauses briefly, slightly confused, and then charges in the direction of the two men - the fuse on the dynamite trailing sparks.

Another shot. This time the unfazed dog becomes totally confused and freaked-out. The dog thinks - These two geniuses have gone insane!

Taking-off to hide from his tormentors the dog runs underneath the brand-new Navigator.

The men continue to scream as they run.

The hot exhaust pipe on the truck touches the dog's rear end. He yelps, drops the dynamite under the truck and takes off after his master.

KABOOM!

The truck is blown into the air, does a summersault and crashes back on the blasted hole in the ice and sinks rapidly to the bottom of the lake leaving the two idiots standing there with a look of shock on their pale faces.

Naturally, the illegal use of explosives is not covered by the insurance company. And the vehicle owner had yet to make the first of sixty - $620 a month payments.

The dog is doing fine.