The Trouble With Labs

The other day I was watching the 10 PM network news when I heard a rustling commotion coming from the bedroom.

click on the dog to enlarge

Her Highness had jumped-up on the bed and proceeded to disassemble a tidy and carefully made bed so she could make a dog nest for herself.

Had she been allowed to continue the state of the bedding would be in shambles.

How to Make Crispy Crunchy Sweet Pickles

Five years ago I tapped-out a whimsical post over at the WauwatosaNOW blog about how to make my popular crispy crunchy sweet pickles.  Little did I know that before too long that recipe would rise to the top of internet searches and that I would be come something of an infobahn pickle sensation.  Don't believe it?  Google:  How to Make Crispy Crunchy Sweet Pickles.

That blog went dark earlier this year after Milwaukee's Journal Sentinel publication group was sold to Gannett newspapers.  Nevertheless, the archive (for the present) lives-on in cyberspace.  Inasmuch as redundancy is a good thing the interweb favorite pickle recipe is reproduced here.

A half dozen years ago I went on a tour of a lighthouse and happened upon an itemization of the perks that the US Congress allotted keepers employed by the Light House Service back in the 1800's.  Aside from lodging there was an annual salary of $600.  There were also consumable provisions including sacks of potatoes and onions.  A barrel of salted pork, sacks of flour, dried beans, sugar and salt.  Coffee, tea - and of all things - barrels of vinegar.
Which reminds me - what do you call a cat that drinks vinegar? 

A sour puss. 
 
I digress.
 
What on earth does somebody do with barrels of vinegar?  Since I've been canning up a storm recently I now have a reasonable notion about the connection to all of that vinegar.  Back in the 1800's preserving your own food wasn't a hobby - it was a way of life.  I suspect that the light house keeper, the Missus and the children supplemented the light-keeper's munificent salary and government provisions with fish, game and homegrown produce.

Here's the clue.  Aside from vast amounts of water a couple of the principle ingredients used in preserving food are vinegar and salt.  I swear I have been going through enough vinegar lately that I should probably be purchasing it by the barrel-full.

In a single day last weekend I packed a dozen quarts of spicy, garlic dill pickle spears.  Big ones that fill the entire length of a quart Ball jar.

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That same day I picked enough tomatoes to make eight quarts of salsa.  

Chock-full of garden tomatoes, green peppers, sweet onions, diced carrots, garlic, a couple of jalapeños and plenty of herbs and spices.  Ordinarily, I call it Garbage Salsa since you sort of make it as you go (or until the pot is filled to the brim).  Inasmuch as the Packers are returning to the Super Bowl the salsa has been rechristened - Super Bowl Salsa Superb Owl Salsa.
 
Speaking of  football - do any of you readers know what the Minnesota Vikings have in common with a stolen automobile?
 
Neither has a title.
 
In any event I have pickles in abundance so I figured it was time to make a humongous batch of the signature crispy-crunchy sweet pickles.  Everyone gets a pint of sweet pickles during the holidays this year.  Replete with a festive bow on the lid.
Here is an easy to follow recipe for making sweet pickles with some crunchy snap.  Just scale it back proportionately if you wish to reduce the volume. 
Start with a sink-full of freshly-picked, scrubbed and rinsed pickle-size cucumbers.

Slice your cukes.  The use of a mandoline makes the job go fast and results in uniform slices.  I like the crinkle cut.  Take care with the fingertips as these blades a sharp.

Toss your cuke slices into a five gallon food-grade plastic bucket.  Everyone should have a five gallon bucket.  My recollection is hazy but there is a possibility my bucket originally held cat litter.  It also appears to be food-grade so maybe not.  I use it to brine meats and fish, haul butchered venison and assist in pickle-making. I even made sauerkraut in it one year.  In a pinch you can sit on it in your deer stand and keep your thermos, lunch and toilet paper inside where it won't get wet.  Like I said - they're indispensable.

The secret to really crunchy pickles is liming them.  Combine one cup of pickling lime with two gallons of cold water and mix thoroughly.  Add to the bucket.  Add additional lime and water until your cuke chips float freely in your pickle barrel.

Snap-on the lid and put it in the cellar overnight.

The following morning drain your limed cuke chips in the sink.  They'll be nice and crispy but you have to soak them to remove the excess lime.  Fill the sink full of slices with cold tap water and drain.  

Repeat three more times.  Leave your slices to soak in cold water until noon -  3 to 4 more hours.

Next - make your brine. 

This is really easy - combine equal parts of sugar and vinegar.  Stir and heat to a boil.  For a humongous batch like this add two - 1 1/2 oz. bottles of pickling spice and a couple of tablespoons of kosher salt.  

Put all of your cukes into the large pot of the boiling brine.  Turn-off the heat, cover and let it set for the balance of the day.  At least 5 hours - Preferably overnight.

Assemble all of your jars, lids* and rings and heat the soaked chips to a slow boil.  Cook for a half-hour.  Stuff your jars with the cooked chips and add the syrupy brine leaving a half-inch of head space.  Install a sterilized lid and screw-on a ring.  

Since this is a hot-pack method of pickle-making keep a low fire under your pot and your lids should seal just fine.  When in doubt process in a boiling water bath for an additional 10-15 minutes.  Remove and allow to cool.  When the lids 'pop' your jars are sealed and your cukes are officially pickles.

These pickles are awesome. You're going to want to put these on top of almost any sandwich you make.  Particularly a crunchy peanut butter, toasted cheese, burger, hot dog or a tuna sammich.  Want to spice them-up?  Add a pinch of crushed red pepper flakes to a jar.

A friend of mine put vinegar in his ear. 

Now he suffers from pickled hearing.
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 * A word about the jars and lids.  Sterilize your jars by immersing them in boiling water or running them through the dishwasher on the 'sanitize' cycle.  Lids are easy - in the microwave heat a Pyrex measuring cup full of water to a boil. Drop your lids in the hot water.  Fish them out with a sterile tongs.

BLT Time

Not the first and won't be the last.
 
Small rolls from the bakery (leftover from book club last evening) - toasted.
Real Hellmann's mayo (humongous multinational - Unilever)
Sliced garden tomato (my garden)

Marchant's bacon (Brussels)
Avocado (Mexico)
Iceberg lettuce (Mexico)
Pickles (my kitchen via the garden)
Heaven!

An Endorsement

Ha!

Made you look.

You thought I was going to endorse someone for office.  

Perhaps The Donald?  Nope.  Never.  He is singularly the worst thing to happen the the Party of Lincoln in history.  But I digress.

I purchased some granola at the grocery a week ago and finally got about to having it for breakfast. 

Leila Bay Trading Company apple cinnamon granola.  This stuff is outstanding!  Dish of vanilla yogurt, topped with granola and a handful of raspberries from the berry patch.

If you see it get some for yourself.  It's sort high in the saturated fat category (22% of Daily Value) but I've rationalized that the high fiber content makes up for the fat.  Nature always seeks a balance.

Yummy stuff. I recommend it.

Harvest Time

Boom!

An avalanche of fresh produce.

I believe there are stuffed peppers and bacon, lettuce and tomato sandwiches in my future.

Yes, aside from a green thumb. I am clairvoyant too.

The Twins

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Taken by a trail camera in a different location - twin fawns.

It's possible they could be the same pair from yesterday's post but there's no way to know for sure.  Spotted fawns all look alike.

Upon further reflection it has occurred to me that it is already the end of August when most fawns are already fading their spots into a respectable autumn coat.  These deer have all their spots.  And they're small too.  Obviously the result of a doe bred very late in the rut.

Going into fall and winter the odds are going to be stacked against these twins.  But there again the whitetail deer is an amazingly durable and adaptable animal.

The Garden Chronicles

While spiritually and emotionally satisfying there's no getting around that gardening can be work.  Hard work.  With all of hoeing, bending and stooping at the close of some days I fieel like a field hand.

The green beans are coming to an end so I took out the row that was planted first.  The second planting is still producing blossoms so I'll leave that.  The cucumbers have been strong and the tomatoes are about ready to come into their own.  Broccoli has been a disappointment.  With all of the heat no florets.  The spuds and onions can probably be harvested after Labor Day.

If you review the picture you'll note the bare spots in the garden are were a previously-planted crop has been harvested.

Vive le Jardin Magnifique!

click image to enlarge

Mama and the Twins

This trail camera is strapped to a tree adjacent to a home-built tree stand along the creek.  I've lost track of how many deer have been killed by me from this tree but I am reminded that I shot a doe from that stand at this location early fall of 2015 during the archery season.

Mama and her twins had walked within range and when one of the fawns began to suckle this old hunter didn't have the heart to shoot either the mom or the kids.  Yeah - I'm a softee.

When another doe cam scampering in to check out the other three deer I shot her instead.

Mama and some twins are hanging here rather regularly...

Experimental Dilly Beans

The secret to making crispy, crunchy sweet or dill pickles or pickled watermelon rind is calcium hydroxide - also know as slaked lime or pickling lime.  It is an inorganic compound with the chemical formula Ca(OH)₂ that when mixed 'slaked' with water has multiple applications in food preparation - canning in particular.  

In my five gallon bucket it is a small matter to mix one cup of lime with two gallons of cold water.  Add your vegetables to the solution and allow them to soak. This process introduces calcium to the vegetable thereby reinforcing the pectin in whatever is being pickled and giving it crunch.  Following a good overnight soak you have to remove the excess lime by means of soaking and rinsing your vegetables a minimum of three times over the course of three hours before proceeding with your recipe.

Having previously culled a bag of large and straight Blue Lake green beans from the garden I soaked them overnight followed by rinsing and soaking, soaking and rinsing, rinsing and soaking.  

click on images to enlarge

This is my first attempt to soak green beans in a lime solution and I observed that to remove the lime from the surface of the bean you have to rinse, soak and agitate.  Shaking the beans in a quart jar of cold water seemed to do the trick.  We'll see.

Basic brine.  In a non-reactive pot combine one quart of white vinegar with two quarts of water and 3/4 cup of canning salt.  (Canning salt is not iodized)  Bring the brine to a boil.

While the brine is heating pack your jars.

Into each jar place a large peeled garlic clove then carefully pack the jars with the beans.  Add dill seed.  I'm partial to Penzeys dill seed but any will do as long as it hasn't been sitting in your pantry for years.  Three tsp. of seed for quarts and 1 1/2 tsp. for pints.  In the spirit of experimentation I included 1 tsp. of crushed red pepper to one of the jars.  Hot dilly beans.

Fill the packed jars with boiling brine leaving a half inch of head space.  Add your lids and bands and process in a boiling water bath for 15 minutes.  

Remove the jars and allow to cool.  When the lids pop your jars are sealed properly.

These are going to set in the cellar for about a month before trying them.  I'll report back with the results.
 ___________________________________________________________________________
*A word about the jars and lids.  Sterilize your jars by immersing them in boiling water or running them through the dishwasher on the 'sanitize' cycle.  Lids are easy - heat a Pyrex measuring cup of water to a boil in the microwave and drop the lids in the hot water to sanitize them.  Fish them out with a tongs.

Dogs of the Whitehouse

politico.com

If you are a dog lover this piece by Politico will warm your heart. Canines aren't partisan.

Dogs of the Whitehouse:  20 presidential pups

The Trouble With Deer

A week ago I was sitting at my desk at the day job when an email from The Frau showed-up.  Attached to it was a picture of a small deer in the yard adjacent to the driveway.  The message said that the deer scampered from the yard, across the the road  and into the ditch adjacent to the cornfield to the south.  No sign of mama.  Middle of the day.  Probably picking at the apples that fell from the tree or an opportunity to raid my garden.

Today I was busying myself in the kitchen making pickles when the dogs (previously lounging on the porch) broke into a cacophony of frenzied barking.

Looking out the window I spied a small, spotted, fawn on the driveway.  It skedaddled across the road and into the ditch adjacent to the cornfield to the south.  No sign of mama. Middle of the day.  Probably picking at the apples under the tree or looking for something to filch from the garden.

I texted The Frau and shared the story inquiring if it might be the same deer.  As it turns out it wasn't.  Both were smaller, but mine had spots, her deer did not.

That's bold.

Mr. Buck

Been catching some photos of bucks in the past month but not much of decent quality worthy of posting.

This is a poorly composed self-portrait of half of half a deer.  The next two puotos were blurred.

Nevertheless - near as I can tell it's a nice eight pointer worth of watching...

click image to enlarge

Porch Setting

Busy day today.

Day job work remotely from home.  Picked pickles.  Exercised dogs.  Hosed down the dogs.  Fed the dogs.  Furminated the dogs to remove all the stickers.  Filled the bird feeders.  Inventoried the pickle stash in the cellar. 

Punched-out on the time clock and kicked-back on the porch with my blonde and black girlfriends.

Seems only right to enjoy a frosty Two Women Lager from New Glarus Brewing Company.

Cheers!

 

Farm Truck

The Frau and I purchased this truck new in late summer of 1997.  It's a 1998 Model Chevrolet CK pick-up truck.  The AC is broke, and it gained another dent a couple of weekends ago but it can haul a pile of gear in the enclosed bed, tote recyclables to the dump, fetch lumber, move a deer stand, tow a boat and more.  It gets around.

Even on the trails out back...

click on a door to enlarge

Thursday Music

The Human Beinz are a 1960s garage band that seems to have surfaced in recent popular culture.

Beginning with the summer Olympics this song has been pitching its playing tune and for the life of me I cannot place the product to which it is associated.  Credit card?  Travel?  Uber?

Kudos to the ad agency for targeting us aging Baby Boomers but I think you dropped the ball when you wanted to close the deal...

Night Sky

As summer begins to close this is one of the last opportunities to observe Saturn, Mars and Antares line-up nearly vertical in the south, southwest sky.

I took the girls out just before 9 PM to listen to the local coyote chorus before bedtime and snapped this shot with an ordinary iPhone.  

A nice breeze kept the skeeters mostly at bay. 

click image to enlarge

Saturn is upper right, Mars is lower center and Antares below Mars and slightly to the left.

The Trouble with Labs

...is that they do like their raw vegetables.

If you're chopping vegetables in the kitchen they're there.  They engage in wishful thinking because they know there is a high probability of raw vegetables like potatoes, tomatoes, broccoli and carrots - especially carrots - will hit the floor for them to scavenge.

It's OK to be careless with these types of veggies because they're a healthy, tasty, snack and are low in calories.

The other problem is if the girls are loose in the yard and not closely supervised they will raid the garden and filch a tomato or a green bean - especially the green beans.  I was picking green beans the other day and found several plants sporting what I call "dog beans".  

click on image to enlarge

Half of it on the plant and half gone.  

Since Labs do not have opposable thumbs suited to picking their beans they have to settle for a nip here and a bite there.  Not worth the expenditure of a huge dose of discipline.  I've got beans to burn.

The garden in all its glory...

 

Vive le Jardin Magnifique!

Give That Man a Cigar

Back in the day sideshow pitchmen - not storekeepers - coined the phrase in the title of this post.

For games of chance cigars were apparently a popular carnival prize.

To this day when someone gets something right - or makes a good point - someone might acknowledge their success by exclaiming:  Give that man a cigar!

The corollary phrase - close but no cigar - has the same origin.

From a recent celebration…

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Small World

Many years ago - in an earlier life - I attended a wedding at what was then St. Francis Catholic Church north of Brussels.  Little did I know that years later I would take up residence in this community founded by Belgian immigrants.

The unincorporated community of Kolberg is at the edge of the Belgian settlement and is home to a smaller number of individuals of German descent.  County Road D Connects this settlement to Forestville and Brussels.  Kolberg is home to Emanuel Evangelical Lutheran Church.  I attended a funeral there today.  

Over the course of approximately three decades a wedding and a funeral book-ending a great deal of change in between.  What a journey.

At the service today was sung a hymn - Old Rugged Cross. Not universally-known this common hymn has its roots in the Door peninsula as well.  The Reverend George Bennard of Sturgeon Bay Friends Church composed and introduced this song for the first time in January of 1913.

Maybe I'm just feeling a little melancholy at the present but this is a pile of evidence of what a small world we live in.  And sometimes you haven't a clue at any particular moment in time.

You can learn more about Friends Community Church and the Old Rugged Cross here and Wisconsin's recognition of this moment in history here.

Smile for the Trail Camera

The girls and I fetched and replaced the memory cards on the five trail cameras today.  The motion-activated digital camera located at the turn a couple hundred yards from the house has been working overtime.  In the space of ten days (8/11 to 8/21) it captured hundreds of photos including the following.

Aside from resizing them I didn't crop any of the pictures leaving the date and time stamp visible.  Quite a diverse selection...

A Rhino Bush Hog

A black Lab

A pair of crows (not than anybody is counting)

A doodlebird (American Woodcock)

A hen turkey with some very small poults (late hatch not a good sign)

A mangy deer

A feral cat

A cottontail

And some guy on a four-wheeler

click on images to enlarge

 

The Non-Apology Apology

From the Olympic gold medalist Ryan Lochte to presidential candidate Donald Trump - They just don't get it.

Lochte:  "I want to apologize for my behavior last weekend — for not being more careful and candid in how I described the events of that early morning and for my role in taking the focus away from the many athletes fulfilling their dreams of participating in the Olympics."

Kellyanne Conway - Donald Trump's new campaign manager - said to my face this morning on the television:  "He has said that he wants to regret anytime he caused someone personal pain by saying something that he didn't intend to cause personal pain."  Continuing she added:  "This is exactly what people love.  They love humility.  They love accessibility.  They love authenticity."

I call bull manure.

Both of these weasels don't get it.  Not a whiff of humility.  No regret.  I guess mama didn't raise these two twerps to have any manners.

Sad.

Extraordinary Groups

If you are observant you will see plenty of extraordinary individuals that belong to extraordinary groups.  What makes them extraordinary are their cultural norms - language, religion, dress, etc.

I've seen plenty of extraordinary groups in my life but this summer it has been the womenfolk.  My observation is that some cultures place a high value on modesty for their members of the female persuasion.

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Unlike some I remain unafraid of such differences.  Being different is what made America Great.

The Garden Chronicles

Fresh-picked, blanched green beans from the garden ready to be packed in one cup portions for the freezer.

These will be awesome this coming winter when a body might commit a heinous crime for tasty, organically-raised, free-range Door County, Blue Lake variety green beans.

This photo doesn't quite do it justice but sometimes they seem to have a neon green glow...

The Garden Chronicles

Run.

Run fast.

Run for your lives.

Vegetable avalanche!

Cucumbers

click on the veggies to enlarge

Green beans

Tomatoes

Sweet peppers

 

Scouting

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This is how you scout for a good location for a deer stand.

Raise the bucket to stand height and carefully survey your surroundings.

Don't laugh.  It works.

The early pioneers pioneered this technique.  Even the driver of the tractor is saying:  Go west young man! 

Personalized License Plates

File this under Odds and Ends.

Been cleaning-up the photo archives here at The Platz and here's a handful of interesting License plates.

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The Uber tag has an ex-date of 2012.  Taken in Brookfield Wisconsin was Uber even "a thing" four years ago?